Last night I dreamt about Anne Rice. I don’t normally dream about people who have passed away, so I always take note when I do. In this dream, Anne and I were traveling together—I recall passing a cemetery, in fact—to a school, I think? I remember a school being involved in some way, and there being difficulty about how to get places (missing a bus, not having a car, having to walk a long distance).
Dreams that involve transportation are often really about the journey of life. So a dream about not being able to get where you want or need to go… Well, it’s self-evident, I think.
Lately, I’ve been trying to figure out where I am in my life and where I’m going. I’m not in a bad place—I have a very good life—but I’ve come to the conclusion that I’ll probably never be where I really want to be in terms of my writing, or even my lifelong desire to live abroad. If I can’t reach those goals, I should probably set new ones, right? But it gets scary to do that. What if I can’t reach the new ones either, and I just keep failing my way through life?
In the dream, we did eventually get a working car. Anne drove. (In dreams, someone else driving often means you don’t feel as though you are in control of the direction your life is going.) I wish I could remember what we talked about. I do recall some interestingly painted tombstones; they looked like modern art rather than anything traditional. One had a hissing white cat painted on it. I remarked on it, and on how weird it was to have a cemetery so close to a school, but Anne didn’t think it was all that strange.
Many years ago, in real life, Anne Rice told me that I had an interesting name and beautiful eyes. Maybe she appeared in this dream to remind me, encourage me. Maybe she drove because she’d been down this road and knew the way.